Where is Your Line in the Sand?
What is your limit? How much talk could you or would you take until you responded physically?
There is so much to unpack in this video. However, I am certainly open to where I might misinterpret things, so I would love to hear your comments.
Let’s focus on the guy in the polo shirt as the “bad guy” or “polo shirt dude.”
From what I can tell and what others in the post thread say, the guy in the polo shirt is looking to pick a fight. In the post I found, a few said he was looking for a fight when he came across the other man.
He gets in the face of the other guy in a threatening, attempting to intimidate manner. While I am not a fan of how the other man addressed him verbally, he certainly did give many warnings. Warnings are challenges and often cause the person to rise to meet the challenge, but the “polo shirt dude” attempts to instigate a fight by telling the other guy to “do something.” He is backing up, putting his hands on the other man’s chest, then quickly back into the guy’s personal space in a very irritating manner.
While threatening talk, the man in the Nike shirt attempts to walk away, but the guy will not leave him alone. “Polo shirt dude,” even says at one point, “what did I do to you? ” to turn the tables and make the other guy appear as the aggressor. Then, “Polo shirt dude” pulls the classic trick of bringing out the cellphone, so he can record himself backing up like the victim.
As I discuss in my book, DISARM DAILY CONFLICT – Your Life Depends On It, people think using their cell phones will cause the other person to stop, but it is generally seen as a threatening action and most often escalates the situation. Interesting how the “Nike shirt man” grabs it and throws it, so the “Polo shirt dude” runs to get it and runs right back to continue his aggressive behaviour.
Again, not a fan of the language “Nike shirt man” was using, but kudos to him for his repeated attempts to walk away.
When does the shit hit the fan? When “polo shirt dude” starts banging on the window and car door. According to the message thread, the “Nike shirt man” had his wife or girlfriend and a child in the car. Could he get in and drive away? It does not appear so, and that might risk harm to others, so he decides enough is enough, and he confronts “polo shirt dude.”
The scene jumps to “Nike shirt man” in the mount reigning down punches on “polo shirt dude.” Of course, people are taking videos of the scenario, cheering him on. Nowadays, you can expect people to video a fight, but don’t expect them to come to your assistance if you are a victim, not that “polo shirt dude” is in this scenario.
Video may help or harm you if and when a case goes to court. “Nike shirt man” lays a pretty good beating on the other guy, but he does stop to his credit. He could have made it much worse. “Polo shirt dude” runs away and is focused on his damn cell phone. Not sure, but maybe he has a mental illness, but not an excuse for his behaviour.
The video then cuts to him again getting up off the ground, all dazed and confused, so I assume he went back again to confront the other guy, not learning from the first physical encounter.
There is much more here to learn than focusing on the physical part but the verbal, behavioural, and psychological aspects.
My question is, how much would you take, or would you have done something differently?