“Just Stand Up To The Bully!”
One of the most common anti-bullying tips is to stand up to your bully, showing them you will not be intimidated.
It makes sense, but if that is the extent of the advice, it has little chance of being effective. Why?
If someone lacks the confidence to stand up to their bully, it can be difficult to know what to do. However, it is essential to remember that many people advising on this issue have the confidence to do so, and they may need help understanding why it can be so hard for someone else to do the same.
Many parents feel frustrated when advising their children, as their children will often be unresponsive or reticent to share their worries and anxieties due to a fear of judgment.
Finding ways to boost their confidence is essential, and this doesn’t necessarily have to involve teaching them how to fight, which is a common thought.
Instead, you can start a conversation with the child or adult based on their interests and areas in which they have confidence. This is a great way to build their self-esteem and provide them with the tools they need to become more independent before injecting more specific anti-bullying tips.
Consider choosing a new activity where confidence can be built gradually through dialogue, support, and encouragement.
Self Defence instructors should use their experiences to create a sense of understanding and empathy with the person they are working with. They can provide comfort, support, and reassurance by sharing stories of fear, anxiety, or mistakes, allowing their student to feel more confident and relate to the instructor.
This process can take anywhere from a few days to months or even years, depending on the individual’s upbringing and experiences with the bullies and their parents. If the parents have been the bullies, another adult or role model needs to intervene, so the bullied person can begin healing and recovery.
This could involve providing emotional support and guidance, helping them to stand up for themselves, and providing resources to ensure their safety and well-being.
I wish it were so simple, but it is not!